Movie Review: The Hobbit: The Desolation of Smaug

First of All: When I was a wee teenager, my dad took me out to see The Lord of the Rings: The Fellowship of the Ring, and my little nerd heart just about kicked the bucket right there from the sheer amount of awesome that stems from anything Tolkien.  The following few weeks remain a hazy blur in my memory, a whirlwind of lengthy text and multiple rewatchings of the movie.  Needless to say, since then, I've been a huge fan of Tolkien, and remain to this day thoroughly impressed by his master work of epic fantasy.

Second of All:  The Desolation of Smaug continues where An Unexpected Journey left off, with Gandalf, Bilbo, and the posse of dwarves trekking toward the Lonely Mountain to fulfill their quest--and, apparently, a prophecy to boot.  Their path with be fraught with massive dangers, from giant spiders and orcs to angry elves.  As the group journeys ever closer to their encounter with a dragon, Gandalf finds himself drawn away to darker business, as the Necromancer's power continues to grow.

Third of All: The Review!
I would be lying if I said that I wasn't delighted to see a movie made out of any of Tolkien's works, and The Desolation of Smaug fit the bill quite nicely.  It was action-packed, full of excitement and emotion, with gorgeous sets and good character development.  There was quite a lot that was both good and bad about it.

First on the list, and quite honestly, probably the whole reason I wanted to see the movie in the first place, is the dragon.  Heck yeah dragons!  Any nerd worth his salt has a soft spot for these giant fiery death lizards, and Smaug is up there on the list of some of the most famous flame-spitters of all time.  I was also very excited about hearing Smaug being voiced by the one and only Benedict Cumberbatch, whose voice is on par with those of Patrick Stuart, James Earl Jones, and so forth, at least in my opinion.  He also did a wonderful job in BBC's series Sherlock, which I'll get into some other time.  But back to dragons.  Smaug was rendered amazingly, in my opinion.  The lithe brutality and cunning of a dragon was very excellently rendered, as well as his sheer size in relation to everything else.  Some masterful animation went into Smaug, for which I applaud the moviemakers.

As with all of the Tolkien movies to date, Peter Jackson did a wonderful job of creating a real-feeling world for the characters to run around in, from the locations to the gorgeous sets, and not to mention the carefully crafted costumes and props. I have to say I'm a little bit in love with the swords they make.  Okay a lot of bit.  Top notch job on that end!

Though a good job was done all around, there were a few things that could have been done better, in my opinion, though.  First of all, my biggest gripe is that The Hobbit is being drawn out into three movies, where two would have fully sufficed to give what's written in the actual book a fantastic rendering.  There are quite a few indicators of this stretching factor which became--in some cases--almost painfully obvious.  First and foremost is the decision to bring back the ladies' favorite man, Legolas.  While this was probably done for fanservice (even though they changed his eye color?), it's a gripe for me because Legolas doesn't even appear in the book (though if he does, it's probably an obscure reference).  In The Desolation of Smaug, Legolas and his elf lady friend (who also doesn't appear in the book) play an enormous part of the plot, which is one of the hugest indications of arbitrarily-made material to draw out the plot and rake in some extra cash.  Also, there are several scenes at the end which have nothing at all to do with the book(you'll know them when you see them, but one involves the dwarves and the dragon, and the others have to do with the aformentioned not-supposed-to-be-there characters).

Strangely enough, I'm not too upset about the fact that they're also following Gandalf's side of the story, which is hardly touched upon in The Hobbit book.  Yes, it is referenced in passing in the text, but the depth to which the movies is delving into his side of things was a pleasant surprise for me. I don't mind this stretching of the story, since it's simply going into detail about something that was already there, and not inventing characters and stories where they probably don't exist.

My last gripe has to do more with some of the technical things in the movie.  Though Smaug's animation was breathtakingly awesome, the same level of attention to detail wasn't paid to the entire movie.  There are more than a few spots where the animation used in some action scenes was pretty obvious, and not nearly as well-executed.  Also, there were some spots where the tension was drawn out using some pretty cliche tactics.

Overall, I loved the movie, despite its many flaws.  I give it a Four and a Half out of Six Nerd Stars.

Book Review: The Forgotten Carols

First of All:  Merry late Christmas!  I'd been meaning to get another post up sooner than this, but the holidays kind of got in the way, and taking time away from family and the festivities to write on a blog was a bit hard, so I didn't get around to it until now.  For those of you who don't practice Christmas, I hope you had a happy time celebrating whatever holiday you enjoy, or if you just outright don't practice anything during December, then I hope you just had a great month.

This time, I'm tackling one of my family's long-time Christmas traditions: Michael McLean's book-and-audio tag team, The Forgotten Carols.  It's a short book, with--if I remember right--less than a hundred pages, which are half-pages in many editions, so that clues you in to the short duration of the story.  Along with the story, McLean wrote music to go along with the different parts of the story, which make for a powerful combination of text and audio.  If you go looking for this book, make sure to pick up one with an included CD of the tracks to listen to at the designated parts of the story; it's so much better that way.

Second of All: The Forgotten Carols follows a relatively young nurse named Constance Louise Chamberlain, who is as stern as her first name infers.  A structured, controlled life has lead her to work at a hospital, which receives a strange request from a rather wealthy family.  The family, it seems, is going on a vacation to Europe, and is leaving behind their strange old uncle, who needs someone to tend him while they're gone.  Constance reluctantly agrees to go take care of the old man, who turns out to be nothing like she expected.  Uncle John, as he is named, leads Constance through a heart-changing experience punctuated by several forgotten Christmas carols that revolve around some unique Christmas tree ornaments.

Third of All: The review!
There's a reason that reading this book and listening to the accompanying audio has been a long-standing Christmas tradition in my family.  The story is powerful, with dynamic characters who are easy to fall in love with, more than a couple plot twists, and a tender ending which will leave you with a smile on your face.  As the designated story reader, it's my job to keep a level head while performing, but there's several points at which I tear up every single time.

Along with the story, the music is gorgeous, well-suited to the story, and deeply powerful.  I'd venture to say that nearly everyone can find one of these songs that fits them in a special way.

Overall, this book-and-audio combo is a wonderful, powerful, and tender experience that could easily find a home in any family's Christmas traditions.  I give it a Six out of Six Nerd Stars.

Video Game Review: Dishonored

First of All:  I heard about this game from two of my good friends: the aforementioned awesome friend who exceeds me in all things Nerdism, and another equally awesome friend who is a Guru in all things video games, both of whom gave it such a stunning recommendation that I figured I'd give a try.  And recently, the Steam game-hosting program had one of their infamous bank-breaking sales, and Dishonored showed up, so I bought it for a whopping 75% off.

As a preface, I'd like to give a crash course in another obscure genre named Steampunk for those of you who don't know about it.  Some people are really into it, and that's totally cool, but it's not quite my thing.  The basic premise of Steampunk is an alternate universe where British Victorian society had continued on indefinitely, with a Queen as the ruling matriarch and lesser Lords, Barons, Counts, etc. as the upper class, and lower-class citizens living in a very Dickensian style.  In these alternate worlds, technology revolves around steam-powered engines and clockwork, though sometimes basic electricity plays a part as well.  It has a very distinctive look, which has very old-time British clothing styles, which are embellished with goggles and all kinds of copper piping and valves, and lots of seemingly superfluous lenses and dials everywhere.  Here's a picture to give you an idea:

(All credit to the dude in the picture, though I don't know his name)

Second of All: The game!
Dishonored is set in an alternate version of England called Dunwall, where there's currently a Bubonic-like plague carried by rats in the city.  The Empress has entrusted her bodyguard (called the Lord Protector) named Corvo, who the player controls, with a mission to travel to other countries to see if they have found a cure.  As the game starts, Corvo is returning unsuccessfully home by boat.  As he meets with his love, the Empress, and her daughter Emily (who may or may not be Corvo's daughter), they are attacked by teleporting assassins, who murder the Empress and kidnap her daughter.  They teleport away without a trace, leaving Corvo alone with the corspe of the Empress as the guards barge in.  Corvo is arrested and thrown into prison for six months, during which time the former advisers take power in the city.  Corvo is sprung from prison by a group of people loyal to the royal family line, who want Corvo to help them find Emily and restore her to the throne.

Not long after this, Corvo is visited in dream by a shadowy entity known as the Outsider, who gives him a mystical glyph on the back of his left hand, enabling him to use otherworldly powers.  The Outsider's motives remain shady, and he simply gives the explanation that it will be "interesting" to watch Corvo's actions in the days to come.  Armed with blade, gun, crossbow, and mystic powers, Corvo sets out to right the wrongs inflicted by the usurpers and find Emily.

Third of All:  The review!!
This was a fantastic first-person stealth action game, with a lot of original gameplay factors and ways to play.  The powers and gadgets available to the player are varied and versatile, letting the player choose in every aspect of the game.  They can steer Corvo into the midst of the enemy, guns blazing and swords hacking, leaving nobody alive; or the player can use any of the hugely varied terrain to sneak in and out without anybody ever knowing he was there.  The events in the game will play out differently as well, as the more chaos that the player causes will have adverse affects on the state of things as a whole. The ending of the game is entirely dependent on the player, too, which was a factor I immensely enjoyed.  Playing through with minimal enemy casualties resolves in a very positive and uplifting turn of events, whereas a high body count turns the ending much darker.  I approved of this game mechanic, as it forces the player to see the consequences of their actions.

As a purely superficial note, I rejoiced most over one thing: ledge-climbing!  Finally a game where you don't actually have to leap above a surface to reach it!  If it's eye-level or lower, then Corvo will actually pull himself up onto the surface.  I was a happy camper.

The stealth and combat systems are very well polished, and the player is free to either barrel through the story, or explore and enjoy the handful of sidequests and hidden items which give the world a very real depth.  Books are littered around the game, giving the player greater insight into the history and workings of this well-crafted world.

There are some aspects of the game that I didn't like, however.  Firstly, I didn't realize that it had a M (mature) rating until halfway through the game, so I didn't see some of the content coming.  There is a lot of blood and death, some inflicted by the player, but the a lot being a byproduct of the plague that is ravaging Dunwall.  There are some mature themes, such as corrupt politicians and their moral wanderings, some strong language, and sexual themes and references--though no actual scenes of sexual acts are shown.  More conservative players might want to stay away from this game if you have a more sensitive temperament.

Overall, I loved the story and gameplay of this game, but was a bit turned off by some of the content.  I give it a Four and a Half out of Six Nerd Stars.

Board Game Review: Betrayal at the House on the Hill

First of All: I first played this game around a year ago, give or take a couple of months, and immediately fell in love with it.  It was first introduced to me by a friend who loves the horror genre and highly recommended it to me.  Sadly, I didn't purchase it myself at the time due to being a poor college student, and I regret it all the time, since it's now between printings, which drives up the scarcity and the price.  Still, that friend still has a copy, and so therefore tonight I thoroughly enjoyed myself with a spooky night of spontaneous spooky hilarity!

Second of All:  The game is based on the horror genre in general, but designed in a way so that no two sessions are the same.  The players are a group of brave (and pretty stupid) explorers who decided to go check out that creepy house on the hill, and wander around exploring.  The fun part is that the only rooms you can see at the beginning are the entry way and the first room of the upper floor.  As you enter each room, a tile is drawn randomly from the deck of room tiles for the ground, upper, or basement floors, making the layout of the house change every time you play.

As you explore, random events will happen to your character, which can be either good or bad, but most are pretty spooky (though some are downright hilarious if you have the right group of friends to play with).  As the players explore the house, they'll trigger certain events which may reveal the Haunt, which is a horror scenario that is determined by the room and the item which triggered the event.  Usually, one of the players (who didn't know it until that moment) is revealed to be the traitor, who has led the other explorers to their potential death at the hands of monsters.  A frantic rush to either kill or survive ensues, leading to usually dramatic endings.

The game is for 3-6 players, and generally runs at about an hour of play time.  Also, it's recommended for people aged 10 and older.

Third of All: The review!
This game is absolutely fantastic in its design, as it allows each and every session of play to be a unique and exciting experience.  What adds to the spontaneity is that the combination of lots of character options and the randomization of the item and event decks, and the different traitors and Haunts that occur.  In all the many times I've played this game, I've never had the same Haunt happen twice, which has drastically increased the replay value for me.

Also, it makes the characters incredibly vulnerable, which fits well with the horror genre, as well as the challenge of the game, as differing scenarios will pit you against a huge variety of monsters and perils.  This may be a point of frustration for some people, but to others it's a thrill.

There are a few downsides to the game, though.  First and foremost is the price.  Even while in print, the game is expensive at close to $50.  Currently, though, with available copies rapidly dropping in number, the laws of supply and demand have hijacked the price to a whopping average of $170, with the high end ranging over $200.

Secondly, as difficulty goes, it falls into the medium range, which can make it hard for very causal board game players to ever win.  Beating the game takes cunning and teamwork, with a good bit of luck.  Kids and the elderly--not to mention the easily frightened or those with very overactive imaginations--may not enjoy the game as much for this reason.

Thirdly, due to the limited amount of event cards and room tiles (and the lack of any expansion packs), returning players can become familiar with the possibilities of the house's regular events, which can take the edge off the excitement of discovery.  This is balanced out with the huge variety of Haunts and the random nature of the game, but too much playing of the game may cause some people to grow tired of the game-play that happens before the Haunt and traitor are revealed.

Overall, I still consider this to be a great game that most people can enjoy.  I give it a Four and a Half out of Six Nerd stars.

Movie Review: Blade Runner

First of All:  A friend of mine, who is infinitely more versed in the ways of Nerdism than even I, got a bunch of us together for a cyberpunk-themed movie night, and first up was one of the great movies that put the genre on the map: Blade Runner, based off of Philip K. Dick's thought-provoking novel named Do Androids Dream of Electric Sheep?   Now for those who don't know, cyberpunk is a sub-genre of science fiction, but it's got a little bit of dystopian government (think Hunger Games or The Giver), a plethora of cyborgs, robots, and androids, and a heck of a lot of grittiness.  One of the most famous cyberpunk movies that most people have heard of is The Matrix, so you can get an idea.

I was pretty excited to see the movie, from the way that my friend hyped it up, and I wasn't disappointed, for reasons that I'll get into later.  Plus, it's a Harrison Ford movie.  Raised from childhood on Star Wars as I was, anything with Harrison Ford in it is immediately worth a good look for me.  There was a lot that I didn't expect, though, since I didn't learn that Blade Runner has an "R" rating until after watching it, which it earns with some pretty crazy stuff.

Second of All:  Blade Runner is set in a future Los Angeles (whose air is remarkably less polluted than the modern-day city), where enormous ziggurat-like skyscrapers dominate the skyscape and humanity pulses in overpopulation on the streets below.  Off-world colonies are constantly tempting people to leave the over-crowded Earth and take to the stars.  Natural animal life is all but extinct, and genetically-manufactured copies are the norm.  King of all the innovations, however, were the Replicants: androids built to look human but infinitely superior in physical and mental ability, who were used for brute labor and dangerous work environments deemed too dangerous for human workers.  That is, until recently, when some Replicants rose up and killed their handlers, causing all human governments to ban them from roaming free on Earth.  Despite this, some Replicants came back to Earth, causing havoc as their mental processors began to degrade.  To combat them, the police force employs special detectives called Blade Runners, who can track the androids down despite their human appearance.

Harrison Ford plays Rick Deckard, a retired Blade Runner who is pulled back into service to track down four Replicants who hijacked a shuttle to Earth and have killed several people since their arrival.

Third of All:  The review!
I have to admit, I was very impressed with Blade Runner.  Through a gritty neo-noir detective story, this movie raises questions about what exactly it is that defines "humanity."  Is it our memories? Our ability to reason? Our perception and appreciation  of the world around us?  Morality?  Being bipedal vertebrates who have formulated language?   It's an interesting thing to think about, particularly if the machines that man creates fit each of those criteria.  To see the Replicants struggling to comprehend their emerging emotions for the first time was a very striking experience.  They were like children in the bodies of superhuman machines, trying desperately to find freedom and a way to prevent their rapidly approaching shut-down date, coping all the while with fear, love, loss, and anger for the first time, with no one to guide them.   I almost cried at the end of the movie as a Replicant knelt dying before Deckard, reflecting on the wonderful things it had seen out in the galaxy, and all of its memories and experiences, which would be lost forever.   Mostly for these reasons, I enjoyed the film immensely.

In all fairness, though, there was a lot in the movie that I didn't agree with.  One of cyberpunk's distinctive traits is a moral shakiness, where blacks and whites are lost in a sea of grays.  So too, is Blade Runner.  As befits a true work of the cyberpunk genre, there was violence (at times very graphic), some nudity, and some less-than-desirable language, which earned it the aforementioned "R" rating.  Also, if you're not a fan of the idea of a hero who's not always heroic, then this movie probably isn't for you.  Deckard is very much a flawed man, who makes some pretty shaky decisions despite his role as protagonist.

Overall, it is a fantastic movie.  If you were able to get a hold of an edited copy, I would recommend watching it, if only to inspire some deep thought about humanity for a while.  I give it a Four and a Half out of Six Nerd Stars.

Book Review: The Way of Kings

First of All: I think I already mentioned how big of a Brandon Sanderson fan I am.  Let me check...yep.  Though I think "mentioned" should be replaced with "gushed about".  Actually, a few days after finishing The Way of Kings, I got to meet the man himself in person at a book signing in Idaho Falls!  What an awesome experience!  Despite the huge line, he took time to speak on a personal level with each and every one of his fans as he signed their books.  To those incredulous among you, here's a photo as proof!

I'm the one with some wicked widows peaks--or "power alleys"--in the back.  Please contain your swooning, ladies.

Second of All:  This is the first book in The Stormlight Archive series, of which the next book is coming ot in March of next year, and which is part of Sanderson's universe called the Cosmere. The story itself, in keeping with the sheer epic nature of any Brandon Sanderson book, is set in its own world, with rules that are radically different than our own.  Most of the planet--at least the parts we get to see--is rocky, with plant and animal life unique to the planet.  Vegetation keeps itself contained in stone-like shells, into which the plant withdraws itself if threatened, and most of the animals we see are crustacean in nature, just on a large--or in the case of some monsters called "chasmfiends", huge--scale.  There are seas and far-off lands where things are different, but most of the action takes place in the rocky part of the world.  Also, there are the constant danger of the Highstorms, massive hurricane-like tempests which rage across the worlds at somewhat predictable intervals.   Sanderson even creates his own monetary system, composed of gems embedded in glass spheres which become more valuable when infused with Stormlight, an energy harvested from the Highstorms.  This Stormlight also powers suits of armor called Shardplate, ancient artifacts that are nearly indestructible and which grant the user enhanced strength and speed.  The greatest warriors of this world own a suit of Shardplate and wield Shardblades, huge and nearly weightless swords that can cut through anything except living flesh.  Instead, the sword burns the soul out of whatever living thing it touches.

The story follows several principal characters.  First is Kaladin, the son of a surgeon who fought in the army but later became a slave for reasons that don't make themselves clear until late in the book.  While in the army, he earned the title "Kaladin Stormblessed," due to the masterful grasp he had of fighting and warfare in general.  There's something special about the man, something that everyone who meets him notices, which is truly epic in nature.

Second is Shallan, the daughter of a wealthy merchant who is seeking to learn under the care of Jasnah Kholin, an atheist heretic scholar in possession of a powerful artifact known as a "Soulcaster" which can transmute any substance into any other substance.  Shallan, despite her innocent appearance, is hiding a dark secret about her purpose to learn under Jasnah.

Third is Dalinar, one of the Highprinces of a nation in a war to avenge their assassinated king, who was Dalinar's brother.  He owns a suit of Shardplate and a Shardblade, and his legendary feats of battle in the past have earned him the nickname "The Blackthorn."  He is entrusted with protecting the new king, his nephew, and is wrapped up in the political plots and deadly warfare that surround him.  Dalinar also suffers from visions during Highstorms, which make people fear he is going mad.

Third of All: The Review!
Though the amount of originality in creating a whole new world--with its own monetary system, government hierarchies, animal and plant life, and so forth--is incredible (and a good job is done of introducing these new concepts without breaking character), it is still a bit confusing for a new reader until about a good quarter of the book passes, when you start to get a hang of how things work.  Kudos to Sanderson, though, for depriving himself completely of all conventional fantasy devices or creatures, while creating his own.

The story is magnificent, with Sanderson's trademark explosive climax at the end.  Tensions build constantly through the book, and due to the sheer number of pages, that makes for a huge amount of conflict at the end, which Sanderson handles with the master's touch.  Each of the characters, even the small ones, are incredibly well made, with personalities, history, and development throughout the book.  Also, none of them seem invulnerable.  Each has flaws, weaknesses, and is plunged into mortal danger which could very well end them if they're not careful.  Overall, it was a masterful work, full of plot twists and mysteries whose answers have to wait until later books, as well as a colorful cast of memorable characters.  Also, it's packed with tidbits and hints at the over-arching plot that encompasses all worlds set in the Cosmere.

My only complaint comes from the length of the book.  Well, not so much the length in pages, but the spacing of the action throughout those pages.  At several points during each of the main characters' plots, I found myself frustrated with what seemed like the tediousness of the plot.  I'm thankful that I had a friend who had already read it, who constantly reassured me that the good stuff was just around the corner.  Looking back, I can see how all of the little things which I was impatient with had to exist to contribute to the awesome finale, and I'm glad that I powered through the hard parts.  The Way of Kings is certainly much larger than any of Sanderson's other works, except perhaps his work with Robert Jordan in The Wheel of Time series, which are even more massive in scale.  Whether this book is Sanderson's contribution to the tradition of epic-length novels, or simply just a huge story that necessitates a ton of pages is unclear.

Regardless, this book was fantastic, as is anything that Sanderson touches.  I give it a Five out of Six Nerd Stars.

Movie Review: A Muppet Christmas Carol

First of All: I love this movie.  Ever since I can remember, my family has watched this movie around Christmas time, and since my sister-in-law hadn't ever seen it (which blew my mind), we popped it in during my weekly visit home and basked in the goodness that is The Muppet Christmas Carol.

Second of All: For those of you who don't know of this movie, it's the Muppet adaptation of the classic Christmas Carol written by the Victorian-era author Charles Dickens.  The premise is that Ebenezer Scrooge (played by the fantastically talented Michael Caine), who is a grumpy and jaded money lender who worries more about his money than whether or not people have homes, is haunted by the ghost of his former business associate Jacob Marley, who tells him to change his ways or be subjected to the same torment that he himself is suffering.  Later that night, Scrooge is haunted by the Spirits of Christmas Past, Present, and Future, who open his eyes to the wonders of Christmas and humanity in general, leaving Scrooge a changed man.

Third of All: The review!
A while ago, I read the actual Christmas Carol, and I have to say, it had a pretty grim tone the whole time.  What is fantastic about the Muppet rendition is that it keeps the severity of the topic of the story while adding the classic humor and satiric jabs that made the Muppets famous.  For example, the original story treats heavily with the living conditions of the poor at the time Dickens wrote it by depicting Bob Cratchit and his family, as well as others the characters pass on the streets who live in poor conditions.  The Muppets, while adding humor and goofy antics, still keep this as a very strong theme of the story, and even accentuate it with placing some of the most adorable Muppets into characters who live in heart-wrenching poverty.  As you see Scrooge's transformation and later determination to help the poor whenever possible, you can see hope return to each of these characters, thus accentuating the point of Dickens's novel with artistic mastery.

As with all Muppet adaptations, they throw in a multitude of musical numbers, which some people may frown upon, seeing as how A Christmas Carol is a classic, and shouldn't be tampered with, etc. etc.   I don't have that problem.  The music in this movie is very well thought-out, and reflects not only the theme of the book, but also the nature of the characters.  Every time that Bob Cratchit (played by the immortal Kermit the Frog) sings, you can see the dogged hope and cheer that pervades his character.

My one miff with this movie is the absolutely horrendous song that Beth (Scrooge's former girlfriend) sings during Scrooge's trip down memory lane.  Granted, it does articulate the fact that she's leaving him because money is more important to him than she is.  The execution, however, is dreadful.  The actress's voice is mediocre at best, and she makes some pretty wonky faces while singing.  And though it only lasts for around four minutes, it seems like ages.  The plot is served just as well by her saying "You did love me once," and then walking away.  If you ever watch it, choose the Theatrical Version, since it cuts this song out completely.

All in all, I love this movie.  It's a beautiful, funny, touching and ultimately glorious story about redemption and the fact that the true spirit of Christmas isn't in presents, it's in the love that we find for those around us.  I give it a five and a half out of six Nerd Stars.